"Good news. You don't have skin cancer."
I started laughing. Out loud.
"Is that funny?"
I lied. "I'm just relieved."
What was so funny was her carefully-crafted performance. I am sure that she sees a ton of people who have funny little growths, each convinced they have days to live. Skin cancer is so much a part of the weird health culture we have, whereas the incidence of it is fairly low. Low incidence doesn't sell sunscreen and giant floppy hats, so it's hyped up so people are scared.
What I had was a seborrheic keratoses, or a Seb-K. It sounds sort of gansta for a bunch of dermatologists. It's benign, quickly treated with liquid nitrogen (the elixir of life for dermatologists), and other than looking somewhat scary, it's nothing.
I'm convinced after this interaction that the job of a dermatologist, aside from removing moles and diagnosing rashes, etc., is to make sure people don't freak out about their freckles. Dr. Xu did a great job of that. If I were freaked out before, and I wasn't, I feel a lot better now.
Yours for liquid nitrogen in the hands of trained professionals,